{This Moment..Let's keep it forever.}

To be condemned...? or not...?

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Another interesting thing which I observed once again.

Well...it all started when we were supposed to do our history project. That god-damn thing was really freaking us all out as we're always so busy and it's hard to find a time where everybody is free. Esther was displeased, Cheryl was busy, Hwee Tian was nonchalant and I was simply too stressed out to even say anything about it.

Remember when I said that it's not that ppl don't have time to do work but it really depends on whether they bother to put in the effort and stuff? Yeah. I don't seem to see the effort in this project. Esther was rather pissed at the end...when only the both of us are doing the projectwork. I was almost late for my piano because of that. Plus, I didn't manage to buy the sketchbook I wanted so badly cuz I was already late for piano.

Well, that made me think some more.

I've realized that Hwee Tian reminds me of my old self during primary school. I'm always only thinking about what I feel like doing and not the greater good. Dan pointed that out to me and I realized that I was being a selfish person.

Instant-gratification. That's what they called it.

So yeah, there I was; listening to Esther speaking in an irritated tone about how Hwee Tian didn't want to stay back. I asked Hwee Tian in class before dismissal whether she was going to stay back and help with the project because I couldn't stay (Piano...remember?) and Cheryl had already gone for her sports heat. (a.k.a school sports stuff) So that would leave Esther finishing up all the work by herself.

"Oh...I'm not staying back because they are going to do painting and I don't really have anything else to do." She replied me in a nonchalant manner and in a tone that practically said 'Heck. I've done all my part. So leave me alone already.'

Then I realized. Why in the world are people always talking about completing only their part? Don't they figure that since another person is busy, (heck. We're all busy.) so we need to fill in their work as well? I felt a wave of irritation at that point because it's not like she had anything after school to do like Cheryl, Esther and me, who have sports heat, choir and piano respectively. She just wanted to go home straight away to do something she wants to.

I bet Dan is somehow laughing at this post if she's reading it. Finally, I've understood how she felt. Plus I realized that she has been an extremely patient person and I feel thankful.

Esther also mentioned in a tactful tone that the painting of the poster was quite screwed up. (Yes, basically to sum it all up, that's the word to use.) I swear that she is kinda...right. Not that I want to say anything about Hwee Tian's painting skills...but her choice of colours is freaking me out. Can you imagine dark green, golden and brown all in the same poster? My god. I got the shock of my life when i saw the picture. Plus I had reminded her to be careful when painting the day before on the bus. Yet the paint was practically spilled everywhere onto the poster. It was so ridiculously messy that I've decided I'll do the painting next time.

She even told me during class that the painting of the poster was hard. Yeah...I know that. Yet I don't think she even gave much effort about it. Esther also told me that Hwee Tian told her that she woke up in the morning and thought that gold was a nice colour, so she painted it golden.

*sigh*

In the end, the project was so screwed up that I can't stand to look at it.

I mean...in terms of effort, I think Hwee Tian really slacked this time. She is usually the person who puts in the most effort. So I'm pretty disappointed in her this time. Cheryl did her best at least, even though she did not have time to help out a lot. Esther was definitely trying her best as well and I'm sure I put in lots of effort when I'm told to do something so important.

Noticed yet? It's not the amount of work you do that makes people think whether you deserve the full marks of the project or not. It's whether you want to put in that effort.

I've also decided that I'm not going to gossip about the other girls anymore. (Not that i do usually, but word still gets around about some people...) It's really not right. Our society is so sick and twisted that people actually even say mean things about someone who is simply trying to be kind. Take Hannah for example, she has her faults by no doubts. Yet she is willing to care and to be concerned for the other girls in the class. Still, people say bad things about her just because she cares too much.

I've decided I shall follow my heart and decide who my friends should be by judging not by their popularity or looks. But by the kindness in their hearts.

Honestly. I think I've definitely forgotten about that since I was seperated from all my primary school friends. I've forgotten about what it means to have a caring friend and to judge people by their kindness, not the way they are popular or good-looking.

This is something that is more of common sense that I feel stupid even saying that I've forgotten about it. Therefore, it is important that i change myself right now. While people strive to become pretty on the outside, I'm going to become a much kinder person on the inside as well.

It's what on the inside that counts. It's your heart.

Anyways, I think Esther is seriously going to mark Hwee Tian down for her lack of effort this time. Thank god the project is only 20% of our CA1...if it was 40%, I think I would have died from looking at it.

Oh yeah. Plus I feel quite happy about myself recently. I've become a much more sociable person and I smile more often. One of my friend came up to me today and told me that her friend said I was pretty. She said my hair has 'style'. LOL. Quite cool acutally.

It's been long since someone said that to me. Frankly, I feel sooooo happy.

Also, we had this scout's/girl guide's international thingy. Anyway, the main thing is that other scouts and girl guides from over the world (only some scouts and guides) would come to our school. We saw a guy scout team from Japan. Kiat Ni was being funny lol. She said one of the boys was trying to hit on me and she was pushing me away to save me from his 'lustful' gaze or something like that. xD Apparently, the guy noticed us and was pointing to me while signalling his friend something. A bit like how guys tell each other there's a cute girl on the opposite of the road.

Seriously, Kiat Ni was hilarious. I couldn't stop laughing.

Plus she went to disturb Pingping again, and almost got choke-slammed for it. xDDD

Quite funny. No. VERY FUNNY. Ahahahaha....

Then she had many plans on how to disturb Pingping. Like Plan A (which failed and earned her a choke-slam. xD) , Plan B (which she was supposed to run away right after calling pingping " Ping-niu", yet she was almost caught and given another strangling by Pingping.) and lastly, Plan C. (which she did not really carry out.)

Life is funny with her around.

Anyways. I better stop blogging and go to bed or write my story. It's getting late.

Nitez to all. ^^

12:35 AM i need you.